This is my second Yorkshire Fringe event and one which I hadn’t planned on seeing, until a friend of mine said that she had been speaking to a mate at New Headingley Club, who thought I might like to go along to review it. The reason I didn’t put it on my ‘must see’ list is the subject matter – dementia. This has lately taken its toll on three people close to me; Alan, a friend’s father-in-law, who died about three years ago; Chris, with whom I was in a tenpin bowling team since the early 1980s and who, along with his wife, put me up at their place from March to October, 1989. It was only supposed to be for a couple of weeks, after my wife and I split up, but the purchase of a house I was buying fell through, as did a couple more! He died just over a year ago. Then there is Pete, the only school friend I stayed in touch with, and although we didn’t meet up on a regular basis due to following different life paths, we always knew we were there for each other. He found out that he had the condition last year when, on noticing his declining ability to do mental arithmetic and becoming. forgetful, he approached his doctor, who said there was nothing to worry about. Being a tenacious little sod he persisted and, after two scans, which revealed nothing, a third, taken from a different angle, showed that he had been correct all along. He was put on a new programme which seems to be slowing down the inevitable, so, unlike Chris, is still with us. Needless to say, we now try to meet up more often. His numbers skills have totally deserted him so I have to put him on the correct bus home. I was obviously far from being the only person in the audience affected by dementia amongst their nearest and dearest, as was revealed in the Q&A session at the end.
Libby Pearson introducing the Q&A.
The piece is a one-man performance by Ian Baxter, who doesn’t play the character, Sam, but becomes him. He is a gay man who recounts the demise of his husband, Derek, as the insidious condition tightens its grip. He begins on their wedding day while a party is going on in their house to celebrate the occasion. As he was describing the revelry occurring in the other room and painting a verbal picture of some of the guests, he removed his tie and put it on his lap. Although they had been together for forty years, it was deemed prudent to now ‘tie the knot’ in order to facilitate the execution of the will and other elements in the dispersement of the estate. In a touching moment, when Sam used the term, ‘tie the knot’, he slowly undid the knot in his neckwear.
This could easily have been a maudlin forty minutes; it was anything but. There was emphasis on the more positive aspects of the situation as well as the negatives. Dementia has the side effect of removing any self-censoring powers, and so, not only was Derek having a pop at anyone who incurred his displeasure, but he also willing to try things which he would have previously avoided, including them both going on a tandem hang gliding experience. I hasten to add that they weren’t strapped to each other, but had a couple of professional to do the tricky part.
Ian Baxter as Sam
The effect that the situation had on Sam was also covered very skilfully, as illustrated by an incident with the washing machine, which refused to open at the end of its cycle. Laundry was a constant task, due to incontinence and food spillage etc, and this irritating episode became the straw which broke camel Sam’s back, setting him off in a blind rage with some of the choicest language you will hear outside of Gordon Ramsey’s kitchen.
The problems with the care system were covered, as well as the hurdles needing to be jumped in order to get to the next palliative stage, finding a suitable care home. The first one in which his wellbeing was entrusted, worked for a while until one of the other residents attacked him after seeing a painting on his wall. Derek was a talented artist and had painted a joint portrait of himself and Sam sharing a kiss. This provoked a tirade of abuse from the resident and made his remaining there untenable.
He was moved to a much more easygoing and tolerant facility where, not only did they allow Derek’s painting to be hung on his wall, they also asked if they could display others in the common rooms of the building.
The final ‘scene’ was Derek’s funeral, neatly completing the circle which had begun at the wedding. The stories of some of the guests who had been present at the nuptials were brought up to date emphasising the stark realisation that Sam was now totally on his own and trying to come to terms with forging a new life.
The acting, from Mr Baxter, was superb, it only took a few minutes for the audience to immerse ourselves into thinking that this really was Sam. He transformed from ribald comedy moments, to shedding tears in an instant, before composing himself just as quickly. A real tour de force. This turned out to be essential as, at the end of the play proper, Sam – not Ian Baxter – took a seat for a Q&A session with the writer, Libby Pearson. Everyone present took this on board and the questions from the audience were asked accordingly, with the answers being given in character and totally unscripted. There was not even the odd prompt from Ms Pearson. Amazing.
Libby Pearson
After this session, Sam left the performance area whilst Libby Pearson explained that this play is normally performed to various organisations concerned with the treatment of dementia. It has also been staged in care homes for both staff and residents. In addition to being a writer, Ms Pearson is also a medical role player who assists students with their handling of situations they may come across once practising.
After a quick change into civvies, Ian Baxter returned as himself, rejoined the writer and more questions were dealt with, but this time more concerned with the mechanics of the piece.
Mr Baxter could not have regaled us with such a brilliant performance, had it not been for the script from Libby Pearson, which dealt with that crucial period in Sam and Derek’s life so superbly. Her writing style, especially the use of language and turns of phrase, put me in mind of Alan Bennett, which is about as good as it gets in my book – and his. The Purple List website credits Ian Baxter as co-writer, which makes sense as, whilst the obstacles encountered and repercussions of the condition are largely common to both the gay and straight communities, the former has extra dimensions added. Prejudice dogs the process of finding suitable care facilities, as does inappropriate behaviour, both intentional and naive.
I was very impressed by the way that Sam didn’t blame the patient who assaulted Derek in the care home, but rather the security system, as, going back to my experiences, violence can be one of the symptoms of dementia. Alan, the sweetest, gentlest man you could wish to meet, had bouts of aggression; Chris might mutter the odd expletive under his breath whilst driving – who doesn’t – but needed to be sectioned twice, after assaulting his wife. He was always immaculately turned out, but when finally admitted to a care home which was able to deal with him, he would become aggressive to the staff when they tried to get him to have a shower, or even a wash. Pete, who I have known since we were both 11, i.e. 65 years, and never had a bad word for anyone, has needed to move into a separate bedroom from his wife as he has become prone to lashing out in his sleep. We were humorously assured at the beginning of the piece that this last situation was not practised in the case of Derek and Sam.
I am not sure that I heard correctly during the performance, but I thought Derek, who was a protester and activist as well as being an artist, had been quoted by Sam as saying that he refused to wear purple. That blew my interpretation of the title out of the water, as I was under the impression that The Purple List was going to be a defiant elderly person’s version of a Bucket List, inspired by the poem, Warning, by Jenny Joseph, which begins, ‘When I am an old woman I shall wear purple/ With a red hat which doesn’t go, and doesn’t suit me.’ I suppose I had better stick to the pale blue linen suit for now then.
To find out more about Purple List Theatre please go to https://www.purplelisttheatre.co.uk
For details of other events in The Yorkshire Fringe Festival it is https://www.yorkshirefringe.co.uk/programme
For more about The New Headingley Club, apart from it serving a cracking pint of Kirkstall Brewery Three Swords, see https://newheadingleyclub.co.uk/site
Photographs by Stan Graham
Tyke It To The Limit 